Five years ago, I anxiously and excitedly awaited the birth of my son.

I was so ready to meet him, yet completely unaware of how deep the dive into motherhood would be. How heart would crack wide open.

Can you be prepared for such a thing? The unconditional, unwavering love I had from the moment I locked eyes on him is a feeling that took my breath away, and continues to catch me off guard.

How deeply obsessed I am with my little boy, the one who made me a mum, the one who completely shifted my perspective, values, vision, priorities and understanding of life.

I have always said Jude is my purpose, he changed everything for me and I will always be grateful.

The first five years have been a total rollercoaster.

The highs, the lows - and I wouldn't change a thing.

So many learnings, which I wanted to share with you, as I reflect on the first five years of Motherhood:

Let go

You’ll learn quickly that you have to relinquish control. Existing in society that places so much value on productivity, control, routine, structure, is the polar opposite of motherhood. This will feel SO tricky to navigate. You will find your own groove in time.

In the early days and weeks, your primary responsibility becomes caring for your baby, there is nothing more important. Yet we still push ourselves to show up, and do ALL the things that in our minds equal productivity = on top of the laundry, perfect house, being everything to everyone and showing up even when you are exhausted, pressure to ‘bounce back’ and fit back into those jeans (don’t get me started) and be the ‘perfect mother’ (this doesn't exists).

The moment you lean into the mess, the chaos, and lower the expectations of what and how things need to be done - you can softly begin to let go.

Let go of the pressure, whether it be internal or external.

Let go of the guilt.

Know that what you are doing is enough. You are enough.

2. Trust

Your intuition is one of the most important tools in motherhood.

While the journey might feel turbulent at times, and self-doubt will creep in often, give yourself the benefit of the doubt that what you feel in your body, is likely the right answer.

Trust that you know best for your child, that you know what is best for you, and that you are not expected to know it all - you will learn as you go. There will be amazing people in your community to lean on and learn from, and it is OK to block out the noise.

Trust your intuition. Trust the process.

3. Community

Your community will be THE most important asset in motherhood.

You can have all the tools, baby gadgets, the picture perfect nursery - none of these matter if you don’t have people to support you. Your village, will look different to what you imagined - and this is OK, you will meet many new people in your journey. You’ll have people who will show up for you, and ground you. People who will step through each stage of mothering by your side. You have to work for it. Community won’t just show up for you in the way you imagine it being. Get comfortable asking for help and accepting help. Invite people in, and let go of relationships that no longer serve you - this is ok, it makes space for the relationships you need.

Put yourself out there, invest in building your community and embrace the village, you cannot do this alone.

4. Unravelling

You will meet an entire new version of yourself, again and again. With each chapter of motherhood, you will grow.

Everything you placed value in, will likely change in some way.

You are safe to navigate this change in whatever way feels right to you. Don’t resist it, lean into it. Be open to learning about yourself, what brings you happiness.

The unraveling is a process, one that happens over a long period of time. Ultimately, uncovering the many layers that existed before you became a mother, and this might feel uncomfortable and unfamiliar, I promise you - that you will love the person you are becoming.

5. You are important too

While it might feel that your entire life has been flipped upside down, in the best possible way, it is normal to feel totally consumed by your child. You are everything to them.

While you do your best to make sure all their needs are met, it might feel really hard to make time for your own needs. In the early weeks and months, even early years while you try to figure out your way of mothering, you will learn a lot about yourself. What fills your cup and what brings you joy.

Integrate self-care rituals into your life, even the smallest glimmers in the beginning, continue to show up for yourself. Ask for help, communicate your needs, so that you can carve out time for yourself. You are worthy of care, of time, of love.

Your needs are important, and you shouldn’t have to sacrifice these needs - sure it might take some readjusting and redirecting, letting go of what isn’t important, so that you can focus on what is.

My entire heart bursts with pride when I think of our journey, five years in and it just keeps getting better and better x